Douchenozzle wearing dark, large frame glasses overheard in library:  “Oh man, my  glasses got scratched!”

Douchenozzle’s friend: “Those are some nice glasses- can they be fixed?”

DWDLFGOIL: “No, they’re not prescription or anything.  Just a style statement.”

DF: ”It’s not good to be messing with your eyes like that”

DWDLFGOIL: “No, it’s ok.  They make me look mysterious when I walk through the Fine Arts building”

What.  I don’t even